My Wild Child Guide for Redefining You

Do you feel like you are maybe just the good girl following the rules these days or maybe you have self imposed limitations you have placed on yourself or by someone else? 

Do you crave to live a life that truly reflects your passions, values, and wildest dreams? 

Well, if you answered yes to all then I can tell you… you’re not alone. I realized that many of us spend our lives following societal expectations, suppressing who we are truly meant to be, and making us feel like we’re never quite “good enough.” I certainly felt that way when I was faced with a version of myself I didn’t recognize in my early 30s. I felt totally lost, confused, and just could not answer the question of “Who am I really?”

The good news? You have the power to destroy your own rulebook and rewrite your own story. Heck, you can start breaking, making and living by your own rules if you want today!  

Here’s the truth: I wasn’t always the free-spirited, globetrotting, self-made international entrepreneur you see today. I was an “uptown girl” in Manhattan, living my dreams in the city until I started drowning in burnout, depression, and the aftermath of my broken marriage. The rules I thought I had to follow were suffocating me. I knew then that something had to change. So, I took a leap of faith, ditched my old life and set out on a journey of self-discovery of losing and finding myself that led me to rewrite my story with love and confidence. In the beginning of my journey I realized I needed to decide the story that I wanted for my life.

I believe the greatest adventures in life begin with a feeling of being lost. It doesn’t mean you’re going nowhere. It means you’re ready for a new adventure. Every turn teaches you, every step strengthens you and the journey is where the magic happens.

Remember: This is just the beginning! 

How do you start?  Here’s my guide to breaking, making, and living by your own rules.

I. Break Your Own Rules:

Following the rules that once defined me were suffocating me at a time in my life when I didn’t recognize myself. I had completely lost who I was living the hustle in NYC after 12 years. The rat race caught up with me. Deciding to hit pause, I moved to the Caribbean island of St. Barth, traveled, and started my first international business on my own. You could say I began living my life more on the edge and I wouldn’t go back and change a thing. I have loved every moment of my journey even the ups and downs because it has shaped me into the person I am today and I am proud of myself. Leaving my old life in NYC behind, my comfort zone, financial security and the life that I had known for 12 years was now behind me, this was the first and hardest step I took. I admit it was quite a radical change, but each step I took and challenge I faced helped me to begin breaking my own self-imposed limitations I had placed on myself.

I stopped asking “should I?” and start asking “why not?”

Your Turn:

• What self-imposed rules are holding you back? Identify them to yourself – Is it your perfectionism, people-pleasing, staying in your comfort zone? Don’t be afraid to face your self imposed limitations. It will be uncomfortable, but when you start to change, you will find growth, strength and become a better version of yourself – I can promise you that. Just take that first step and break your own rules first.

• What rule are you ready to break today?

Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame. – Brene Brown

II. Make Your Own Rules:

How do you want to experience life?

Once I traded my business suits for bathing suits I started tapping into my adventurous side. I began getting into mindfulness practices such as yoga & meditation, learning French and exploring new passions I never knew I had. 

Your Turn:

• Designing a life you love: Define your core values (what truly matters to you?) and visualize your perfect day. How does your day flow? What are you doing? Who are you with? What are you learning? How can you start incorporating these elements of your dream into day to day living now?
• What’s one rule you’re going to make for yourself to prioritize your well-being (physical, emotional or spiritual)?

Remember, don’t be afraid to experiment and be vulnerable. Growth happens outside your comfort zone. Do something you have never done before, travel to new destinations, and begin to enjoy the learning process. There is no destination when you are enjoying the journey including the messy & beautiful moments in life.

The courage to be vulnerable is not about winning or losing, it’s about the courage to show up when you can’t predict or control the outcome. – Brene Brown

Boy, do I love me some Brene Brown. Highly recommend you read her books and listen to her talks.

III. Live by Your Own Rules: Now it’s Time to Ride Your Own Wild Waves

My journey hasn’t been a smooth ride and yours won’t be either (nobody has an easy perfect journey). I have been faced with many questions about myself, what I want, challenges in starting all over in my mid 30s, and many moments of self-doubt. I think the thing that helped me the most was to stay open-minded, be curious, and push myself to step outside of my comfort zone. Living life a bit more on the edge has helped me overcome my struggles and become more aligned with my authentic self.

Your Turn:

• Conquer change with love and confidence: growth requires stepping outside your comfort zone. Stay curious: never stop learning and expanding your horizons. 

Ok, now it’s really your turn to start putting all of this into action and I am excited to share my tips with you. I don’t believe we should be on our journeys alone. I want to help you to challenge yourself to change your story. Forget the doubt-fueled story you keep telling yourself. Choose the story you want for your life. You’re the hero, and there is no other perfect time than now to start. A life you love and have created for yourself is waiting for you.

Download How to Rewrite Your Story With Love and Confidence

I think of it this way. Sometimes, getting lost isn’t about finding your way back, but discovering secrets your map never held. Every turn reveals another clue, piecing together a unique adventure. The journey itself is your story.